ZOMBiE's Blog
This Blog is best viewed in 1024x786, in Firefox 3.0, Internet Explorer 6.0 or Opera 8.0 or above. Flash Player 9 or above required... That was for 10 years ago, most modern browsers can view my blog.

You accept the Terms and Conditions of cygig.blogspot once you start accessing this blog. Else, please leave immediately.

I Call Myself

"Educated" At
Maha Bodhi School, Victoria School, Anderson JC, LASALLE College of the Arts

What I Do
Lazing, Hobby Crafting, DIY, Graphic Design, Computer Stuff that you don't get it

What I Avoid
Hipsters, Soccer, Apple Brand, Outings

How Am I Like
Logical, Practical, Off-Beat, Anti-Social, Sarcastic

Number of Views

View My Stats

Talk Cock

Check This Out!
ZOMBiE's Theorem
My Dark Literature(Poems, Songs, Short Stories)

Classic Enteries

zB BlogLock

This Blog...
Theme: Glass Core METAL

No using of my blog skin and zB Blog Tools without my permission. Some music streamed to blog can be freely distributed under Creative Commons. Others are linked from external websites.

Current Posts
January 2004
September 2004
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
October 2010
November 2010
January 2011
February 2011
May 2011
June 2011
December 2011
January 2012
February 2012
March 2012
June 2012
July 2012
September 2012
July 2013
August 2013
October 2013
January 2014
March 2014
April 2014

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution
Non Commercial
No Derivs
2.5 License

Sunday, May 28, 2006
Tinge of Madness
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 3:08 PM --- Post#114880011360930943

Rainy days...rainy days are suppose to be fun and comfortable. But dunno why im starting to 胡思乱想 again. I had been thinking a lot a lot since last night.

Suddenly mid year is around the corner...I think back at all my Math...Trigo, curve sketching, functions, integration....I guess my brain had rejected and trash all of them after the promos last year. Ever since i enter JC, all my test/exams are flops. Again im wondering why am i still here. Why dint i fail Promo?

Gosh, again a lot of images and video footage got played out in my mind...I search under "VS" and i realised smthing: all that is under is "Its fun time then!". The feeling is gone. I tried looking up memories of past fun times. It all came in fragments. Where as all the unhappy stuff in AJC are all so damn vivid. I still remember their faces so well so scary. Again i began to sort out my secondary school time's memory in chronological order. Failed. Reason: I had no sense of timing. Despite me being able to capture details of events well, what ppl said, what ppl did, im unable to arrange those events in accordance to time.

One day when i graduate, memories in AJC will be marked as "trash" and they will get replace by new ones. Friends will degenerate simply becos of loss of contact. Good friends now will feel awkward in 2 years time. My school changes, my family changes, my life changes, my friends changes, even my character changes. Until that i really dunno what to believe in. What to trust, becos nothing can be trusted. I will never believe in "good friends" or "buddies". Every happy moment now is not meant to be happy, becos in 2 years time when i think back, that happy moment then will become a sad moment becos i noe everyone in that event will be gone and that i will think "why cant it be nice like the past?". I had already tried my best to cherish everything. I never regretted, just depressed.

Anyway, i will be really bored this holiday. I will sit on my comp and do nothing. Either that or i will sleep whole day so i dun 胡思乱想 anymore. Sometimes i wonder...why for this recent period of time, i never really felt sad, or that the impact of depression is much much lighter? Things got better? Thinking back. No.

Things never got better. Never. I think its cos im numb to all those. Im almost totally numb now. Thats why even the sky fall i oso wun feel a shit. "Wun feel a shit" is what my brain says. Becos my brain says so, i dunno how my heart will feel. I dun wish to know either. Thats why when my brain is tired after few weeks of little sleep, i get screwed as my heart will pout everything out.

No one will be reading this entry i guess, the one thing that noes me best is my blog. Cos my blog backs up my memory. Im sick of words like "look on the brite side", "dun think too much", "haizz..why u liddat" or anything similar...Can someone out there hear me?

View/Post Comments (0)