ZOMBiE's Blog
This Blog is best viewed in 1024x786, in Firefox 3.0, Internet Explorer 6.0 or Opera 8.0 or above. Flash Player 9 or above required... That was for 10 years ago, most modern browsers can view my blog.

You accept the Terms and Conditions of cygig.blogspot once you start accessing this blog. Else, please leave immediately.

I Call Myself

"Educated" At
Maha Bodhi School, Victoria School, Anderson JC, LASALLE College of the Arts

What I Do
Lazing, Hobby Crafting, DIY, Graphic Design, Computer Stuff that you don't get it

What I Avoid
Hipsters, Soccer, Apple Brand, Outings

How Am I Like
Logical, Practical, Off-Beat, Anti-Social, Sarcastic

Number of Views

View My Stats

Talk Cock

Check This Out!
ZOMBiE's Theorem
My Dark Literature(Poems, Songs, Short Stories)

Classic Enteries

zB BlogLock

This Blog...
Theme: Glass Core METAL

No using of my blog skin and zB Blog Tools without my permission. Some music streamed to blog can be freely distributed under Creative Commons. Others are linked from external websites.

Current Posts
January 2004
September 2004
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
October 2010
November 2010
January 2011
February 2011
May 2011
June 2011
December 2011
January 2012
February 2012
March 2012
June 2012
July 2012
September 2012
July 2013
August 2013
October 2013
January 2014
March 2014
April 2014

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution
Non Commercial
No Derivs
2.5 License

Friday, January 30, 2009
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 10:32 PM --- Post#3680471579276993083

To Lily:

Hamsters SWIMS!

To WK:

Monkey and giraffe can swim to..

View/Post Comments (0)

Monday, January 26, 2009
Orange Valley
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 11:24 PM --- Post#4181762178420204308

Today is the first day of CNY, most of the younger Chinese will be paying respect to their grandpa and grandma along with their dad and mom. My grandpa passed away soon after i was borned, and my grandma was down with severe diabetes and various other ailments. Her illness had rendered her unable to walk and control her bowels, some said that those were the effects of her sinful doings in the past, while others said that its all cos she did not know how to control her own diet.

In short, according to my parents and relatives, my grandma used to be a sharp tongued woman with nothing good coming out of her mouth. Not only she distrusted outsiders, she deemed her own son and daughter as unreliable as well. Gossiping was one of her "well-acclaimed" hobbies, and it served as a trouble magnet for her. She was extremely money minded and held financial issues as top priority over everything else, she would not hesitate to ask for money over the slightest thing, even from her own children and close friends. Often, ppl around her are framed for stealing her cash and jeweleries.

Anyway, she has been unable to move around on her own ever since, i think, she tripped over something in my uncle's house and was immediately rushed to the hospital. Even though her leg injuries were patched, she refused to re-learn how to walk, and would rather depend on ppl to push her on wheelchair. So my mom and uncle decided to put her in a nursing home, in view that there wun be anyone in our houses to take care of my grandma 24/7.

They insist on calling it "nursing home" rather than "old folk's home". There may prolly be some difference in the two, but in my view, the former is just a nicer name for the later one.

Old grandma used to be in Serene's Nursing Home near Joo Chiat. Trust me, just the odor alone was enuff to put you off from entering the home. It looked like a convert from a former ran down bungalow, a structure that was "recycled" into something else more useful. Either that, or the home really had a damn long history. The building was peeling and some parts of the compound looked like tiny ruins, where abandoned furniture were thrown together in a corner and weeds had overruled that place. The dormitories for the elderly were badly ventilated. No sign of technology were seen every time i visited that place. The equipment and furniture were old and creeky, some were even pest infested. But the up side is that the price is cheap, roughly $1000 a month. After quarrels with her roommate, Grandma was kicking a fuss to change a place, which they agreed to promptly before Grandma had the idea of going home, which will cause them infinite trouble.

This new, ahem, NURSING home, Orange Valley is much much better. Its a new multi level building, with neat rooms and arranged beds. Each dormitory has its own rest room with elderly friendly features, as well as compartments for their belongings and personal items. Many fans are installed, and alongside with numerous windows, the rooms are very well ventilated. Each level as a common main hall, where the elderly can come out to have their meal or watch TV. Some levels has a small court yard with magnificent outside view. The roof of the complex is a man-made garden, sort of a bigger version of the mini courtyard.

I find this home much better than the previous one. In fact, i would prolly not mind if im sent to one when im old. The down is that its twice as expensive than the former home, at $2000 a month.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
The common main hall with tables, chairs and TV.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Open and airy view.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
The mini courtyard.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Inside the my grandma's room

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Elderly friendly toilet in each room.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
View from window in my grandma's room.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Her bed.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Food prepared by the stuff, should be dinner.

View/Post Comments (0)

Happy CNY
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 10:54 PM --- Post#7452668889290052864

I wish everyone visiting my blog a Happy CNY. I dint send any mass sms this time cos my sms bursting liao.

View/Post Comments (0)

Sunday, January 25, 2009
[Warning] Ramly Burger Store near CCK MRT
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 12:18 AM --- Post#503549801560098863

I went to CCK MRT today with my friends. Several hundred meters away there was a stall selling Ramly's Burger. I was so enthusiastic that after i saw several ppl bought the burgers, i ordered one from them too.

One burger cost $3, i used to buy one at $2.50 in pasar malams. It was prolly due to inflation and rentals, that the price increased.

I wanted beef, but only chicken and fish available. When she started to fry the patty, i realised that the patty looks more like those my mom bought from Cold Storage rather than those i saw at Pasar Malam. Normally Ramly Burger patty are dark red in colour without much coating, but the one i saw was brown with a thick flour coat. The burger used seems different also.

After i made the purchase, i began to eat the burger pipe hot. Almost no juice ozze out, the burger was dry. The cheese was still unmolten in one corner, and the taste was so different. I remb all those Ramly's that i had was always exploding with juices and sauces, as well as molten cheeses. The taste i remb was pure shiokness andjoy.

For me, i think that using $3 to purchase a sub-standard Ramly's Burger was not worth it at all. But of course, everyone differ in taste, someone may find it alright or wonderful. Serious Ramly Burger lovers may want to exercise caution when purchasing from that stall.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

For further discussion, you can view the thread in VR-Zone posted by me.

View/Post Comments (0)

Tuesday, January 20, 2009
360 View of My Room
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 1:51 AM --- Post#2072858194662249851

In case the 180 degree view of my room isnt impressive enough, here i bring up the 360 degree view of my room. This is a second set of picture, the first one has my face in the TV's reflection and it was removed. This set of picture has a much better exposure. I do realized some flaws in the blending, the process is automated and i wun be editing them manually.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Click To View Full Size Image

View/Post Comments (0)

Monday, January 19, 2009
Neo and Agent Smiths - The Matrix Animal Edition
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 12:05 PM --- Post#7509035541383932188

View/Post Comments (0)

The "Examiner"
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 12:21 AM --- Post#525014790390494060

My personality from http://www.mypersonality.info is
ISTJ - The "Examiner"

ISTJs are responsible, loyal and hard working. They have an acute sense of right and wrong and work hard at preserving established norms and traditions. Because of their deep sense of duty they are dedicated to everything they do and are very dependable. ISTJs care deeply for those closest to them.

"ISTJs are often called inspectors. They have a keen sense of right and wrong, especially in their area of interest and/or responsibility. They are noted for devotion to duty. Punctuality is a watchword of the ISTJ. The secretary, clerk, or business(wo)man by whom others set their clocks is likely to be an ISTJ."
- ISTJ Profile (TypeLogic)

"ISTJs are very loyal, faithful, and dependable. They place great importance on honesty and integrity. They are "good citizens" who can be depended on to do the right thing for their families and communities. While they generally take things very seriously, they also usually have an offbeat sense of humor and can be a lot of fun - especially at family or work-related gatherings."
- Portrait of an ISTJ (The Personality Page)

"...characterized by decisiveness in practical affairs, are the guardians of institutions, and if only one adjective could be selected, "super dependable" would best describe them."
- The Portrait of the Inspector Guardian (Keirsey)
"...private, does not appreciate strangeness, not adventurous, not spontaneous, follows the rules..."
- Jung Type Descriptions (ISTJ) (similarminds.com)

"At work, ISTJs get things done on a timely basis. They honor deadlines, and they believe in thoroughness. A half-finished job is not a job well done. They established procedures and schedules, and are uncomfortable with those who do not do the same. ISTJs put duty before pleasure. As long as they can fulfill their responsibilities, they feel useful and thereby satisfied. Their work does not have to be fun, but it has to count toward something productive. ISTJs believe that vacations are something that one takes only when work has been accomplished; thus, at times they do not take vacations even when they could and should."
- ISTJ - The Reliant (Lifexplore)

View/Post Comments (0)

Sunday, January 18, 2009
How you feel about PRCs?
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 12:35 PM --- Post#3577768751608186935

To be honest, how do u feel generally about PRCs. Im referring to those working/staying/studying in Singapore.

Personally, sometimes i find them having bad public manners. Things like speaking very loudly on train and bus, cutting ppl's queue, some that i know keep saying they are true blue Singaporeans when their accent is so obvious.

Other facts like dressing in a very, i dunno how to say, weird manner? Their boorish behavior and unshaven armpit hair for girls simply irks me, though i must admit those may be their culture and its not for us to criticize.

My friend in uni says that there are so many PRCs in her math class that she feels so inferior as her math can never be as powerful as the PRC though she once top her class in JC. She feels unfair why they let so many PRC to come in to compete in a losing end battle with their own Singaporeans.

Read my forum post on this subject. As of 18 Jan 09 12:38pm,
"I generally have a bad impression or experience with them." - 42/55 (76.36%)
"I find them generally fine and pleasant, and not affecting me much" - 13/55 (23.64%)

View/Post Comments (0)

Saturday, January 17, 2009
Spring Cleaning Done!
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 11:05 PM --- Post#8476807575182982197

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
[Click to view full size image]

Rant later, my spring cleaning is done. My room, or I rather call it my HQ, has been re-organized and re-done. It took me three whole weeks!

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Garage Compartment (Small): Stores all miscellaneous stuff and general household items

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Admin Compartment: All my personal items are here. These includes spare specs, medicine, bank books, important letters, keys, money, cap and my precious labeling machine.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Garage Compartment (Big): Store bigger items that the small Garage Compartment cannot store. Nearer to the inside are three transparent boxes, they are (from left to right) to store cleaning equipment, pouches/cases/wallets/mini boxes and keychains/small gadgets. On the top left, the blue box and black tin stores Pokemon cards and the green lid box stores HDD magnets. Placed below are headphones and headphone cases. The orange tool box stores misc. audio equipment.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Audio Box: This is what you see inside the orange tool box meant for audio equipment. Various headamps, tips, accessories, batteries etc

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Photographic Compartment: Stores lighting, light box, tripods, cameras and other related equipment.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Audio CD Compartment: My Audio CD collections. As well as some empty disc jewel cases.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Show Case Gallery: A simple glass panel gallery to show case some toys. Power rangers at the bottom. The top is emptied for future use.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Book Compartment: Store my pathetic collection of books.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Stationery Compartment: Store stationery, new and old sketch books, past BD cards and sticker albums, empty files etc.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
One End of My Room: You see my Tool Rack, TV and Arm Chair

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Tool Rack: This rack is where i place all my tools for soldering and general repair. On top u see my opened tool box. Below the tool box is a Precision Paper Cutter. Beside is the TQ95 soldering iron and the tip cleaner.

On the 3rd level, you will find marker sets, expendables (cable ties, sand paper, loctite, tapes etc), hair dryer (for heat shrinking), mini Engineer's Vice that u can clamp on the table, Alcohol for PCB cleaning and brush, third hand tool, multimeter, general usage wire roll and boxes to put ICs.

On the second level lives audio connectors and audio-specfic electronic components stored away in zip locks and packed into categories into transparent boxes. Three boxes behind: One for audio cables, another for sleevings and the last one for heat shrink tubes. Beside is another two boxes, one for commonly used audio cables and another for commonly used heat shrink tubes. A toilet roll beside, a tub filled with opened and odd spares and a roll of silicon sleeve.

On the first level lies all kinds of zip locks, plastic film for wrapping, a box for obsoleted tools and equipment, another for various casings and the last box for general electronic components and prototypes.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Optical Storage Compartment (Blank): Where all my blank CDs and casings goes.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
IT Garage Compartment: Inks, CD wallets and one box of data cables.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Paper Compartment: Stores photo paper as well as a laptop sleeve right below.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Optical Storage Compartment (Data): Data CDs from shops as well as backups of my PC.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
To-Go Station: Store my Messenger Bag, Wallet, CD, water bottle. Inside my bag is all my portable devices. Pick them up and ready to go anytime.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Work Table: House my CPU chassis and networking machines as well as providing me with a space to do work. It can be for reading, soldering, repairing, add a light box and lamps and become a photo studio, or put to put my laptop (notice the yellow LAN cable is for my laptop). Notice the TOYOGO container on the floor. There is one below my PC Table as well. They store boxes and packaging of products i had bought (DAPs, HDD, headphone, NDS, hand phones etc). Inside the packaging are unsused accessories, manuals and receipt. These big TOYOGO boxes double up as a foot rest, thus put underneath the table.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
PC Table: House my Computing devices like monitor, keyboard, mouse, speakers and printer. On top of my sub is a basket for commonly used gadgets like thumb drives, VoIP headset, nail clipper, medicated oil, calculator etc etc. Notice long cables are tied up using cable ties on the wall. On the table, one bunch of tied up cables are for data (USB female/micro USB/Mini USB)and another bunch for charging (NDS/D2/Nokia 5320/Mini3). This makes external IO and charging easy and mess free.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Bag on wall: Bagpacks are hooked on wall using 3M Command.

View/Post Comments (3)

Friday, January 09, 2009
Thrash Memories
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 1:08 AM --- Post#1532616363339808962

Im currently tidying my room. I vet thru all my old documents before throwing them away. Things i read thru are stuff like:

- Letters asking me to go for army medical check up
- Letters asking me to report to Tekong for BMT
- Brochures on how to survive BMT
- My first medical letter that actually change my whole NS life by making me non-combat fit
- All my excuse letters, time slips, off passes, doctor's letters...
- BD n Farewell cards given to me during JC
- My sketch book from JC till now
- My primary school photos and stuff i doodle then
- Secondary school writing pads and graduation day event list
- My photocopied result slips
- Letters and brochures from Uni
- Rejection letters upon applying for my courses
- My primary school sticker books

and much more.

For some damned reason, i feel so much pain and sorrow prowling thru these old items. Those masked and archived memories are brought back once again. Sometimes i broke down temporarily looking at those items scattered on my floor as i try to organise them, it looks like a portray of my broken past.

Not a single item brings back good memories. Even the cute sticker book reminded me that thats one of the pathetically few hobbies i had in primary school. I was proud of my doodling but other always treat them as rubbish. Yet my sis's drawing get all well acclaimed. I should be ashamed of myself calling me a "graphic designer".

End up, i threw most of them all away. Crush them and tear them, then smashed them into the thrash bag.

I cant sleep well for the past few nights. Those flashes of memories keep coming back, haunting me endlessly.

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

View/Post Comments (0)

Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Pedophile Beard
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 11:55 PM --- Post#451894261218974556

View/Post Comments (0)

Tuesday, January 06, 2009
WTS: Power Ranger & Pokemon Models + Chicken Essence Bottles
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 3:56 AM --- Post#79811472716559860


VR-Zone: Technology Beats
[Click to see full size image]

- Some scratches, tarnished metal parts and peeled stickers
- Some missing accessories
- No box, no manual, just the toys itself
- Red Dragon Thunderzord has a broken hind left leg

- Deluxe Megazord Set
- Thunderzord Assault Team Set
- Red Dragon Thunderzord
- White Tigerzord
- Deluxe Shogun Megazord Set
- Mini Tor The Shuttle Zord
- White Ranger (of the Mighty Morphin series) Action Figure

There will be no default pricing. Email/MSN/SMS/Call me to quote a price. If the response is good, i will take the highest price offered before 15 Jan 2009. Else, i will consider selling it to any available buyers if the pricing is reasonable.

You can purchase either everything or individual sets. A "set" is defined as items that match one of the listed descriptions in "Contents" above.

Buyers are to meet and collect at
- Eunos MRT
- Any place to my convenience


VR-Zone: Technology Beats
[Click to see full size image]

- Mostly in good conditions
- Figurines posses scratches, out-of-boundary paintings and uneven surfaces due to the nature of plastic molding imperfection which are already present during purchase, which can only be noticed in close observation

- All 151 Pokemon Figurines from "Pokemon: Indigo League Season 1"
- Various Pokemon Figurines from other seasons
- Various Digimon Figurines from various seasons
- Plastic TOYOGO Containter

For the 151 Pokemon Figurines from "Pokemon: Indigo League Season 1", except Flareon and maybe a few others, all of them bear the following engravement:
- either "任天堂" or "Nintendo" text
- a copyright logo in front of either "任天堂" or "Nintendo" text
- "Tomy" text

It seems to indicate they are original quality toys from Tomy and Nintendo. Some Pokemon figurines i once had do not bear these engravement and are inferior in quality.

No key chain holes on all 151 of them.

Again, there will be no default pricing. Email/MSN/SMS/Call me to quote a price. If the response is good, i will take the highest price offered before 15 Jan 2009. Else, i will consider selling it to any available buyers if the pricing is reasonable.

The price you quote will be for ALL items that match the listed descriptions in "Contents" above. You cannot buy individual figurines. You will receive everything inside the TOYOGO box.

Buyers are to meet and collect at
- Eunos MRT
- Any place to my convenience


VR-Zone: Technology Beats
[Click to see full size image]

- Some minor dents on the caps
- Some peeling of stickers

- 10 empty BRANDS Essence of Chicken glass bottles
- 8 matching bottle caps (2 missing)
- Colourful stones filled in one of the bottles (as seen in picture)

These bottles have almost no commercial values, but they can be used for projects or any other usage you deem fit. They are cleaned.

Any price will do, since they are almost commercially useless. Email/MSN/SMS/Call me to quote your price.

The price you quote will be for ALL items that match the listed descriptions in "Contents" above. You cannot buy individual bottles or parts.

Buyers are to meet and collect only at Eunos MRT.

View/Post Comments (0)

Monday, January 05, 2009
Spring Cleaning!
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 1:20 AM --- Post#246639838750886586

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

Bought a mini vacuum, just 5 minutes of sucking collected one so much dust liao. Why is my room so damn dusty... Its time for spring cleaning!

View/Post Comments (0)

Happenings at Liang Court
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 1:20 AM --- Post#988310429472760385

Headed down Liang Court w yan. Found some absurd stuff:

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Extra Large apples selling for $16.90

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Water Melon selling for $69.90

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Salty flavor chocolate

View/Post Comments (0)

Saturday, January 03, 2009
Civilian Conversion Course
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 12:24 PM --- Post#127424205182459251

Civilian Conversion Course
It has been roughly three weeks since I ORD. These three weeks pass so damn fast. Its always liddat, good times pass significantly faster than bad times. OR rather, bad times pass slow.

I treat all these times as civilian conversion course. Meaning to say tweak my mindset back to civilian thinking. You think its easy? NO! At first i tot, "Aiya, go back become civilian, so easy, i stay out one summore"

Seems that im wrong.

1. I realized no one speaks vulgarities around me.
2. Where are all the smokers? I see only a few at my coffee shop.
3. Colourful clothing sure makes my eyes dazzle, instead of all green.
4. I wake up at 6am, just to realised i need not report to camp.
5. Feels weird without cook house food, no 11B scanning.
6. Everytime i take out my identity card, i will stop and think why its pink now.
7. Adults around me in camp used to be very approachable and friendly. Now the adults beside me seems to treat me like secondary school kid.

The worst is that I suddenly wake up my idea, and found that i had already finished that army phase in my life, and its time to move on. Upon realizing that, I start to fear of my future. For the past two years, there is no worries for what happen next. No matter what, im getting my $440. Now, i got to plan everything myself, move on myself, no more living in the auto-guided army life. Now i realized, i got the chance of not getting a job. I got chance to be fired. I will need to work hard for work results now, not like last time slack also get my pay.

Im certainly not prepared to move on. And these weeks of CCC hopefully can help me relax and settle my thoughts down.

Maybe its cos i got no income now. Or maybe im too busy doing maintenance work at home. Or im too tired. Or im too lazy.

I haven been going out w anyone for a looooong time. I haven been toking to my friends too. Do i even have friends in the first place. Why do i feel that my gadgets and my materialistic stuff feels more like a 'friend' to those other human out there? Why why why why?

I dun remb talking to anyone else other than my family member, which actually i dun really feel like talking.

I feel very bored and lonely these weeks, i numb myself by trying to settle my thoughts, play games, surf net, do projects, tidy room etc etc.. Sometimes i scream in my head "I WANT TO TALK TO SOMEONE!". I sit in front of my screen waiting for ppl to come online on MSN. Truth is everyone else is busy, no one is there to entertain me.

My friend once told me, "U keep getting into friendship and other problems since young, what is the constant here? Isnt it you? Could you yourself be the problem?" Yes its me. But i found no answer on how to rectify this bug in me.

Its really scary when one day u got no one to talk to at all...

Last time during army, i see them only for a couple of hours a day. Now im a free man, and that i stayed at home all the while to rot, i see them whole day long. I feel like so distant from my parents nowadays. Unlike being with my friends, i got to put up a mask in front of them. When im at the bottom pit of my life, they dint realised smthing is wrong with me and isnt there most of the time. When i tell them my problems, they either treat it lightly, heck care, tell me not to complain or scold me.

"How can your officer do this? Come one day i go camp go scold him. U tell him that I will go MP if he still liddat. Why u so stupid, why u never tell him off? So what of he officer? Rally everyone go rebel la!" Thats what my dad always said when i told him about irregularities in camp. I remb once i got so fed up that i gave him my phone with my officer's number on the dialing and ask my dad to talk to him. My dad immediately push it away and give excuses. He can say a lot but no action will happen.

I dunno why, but recently he blew up more and more. He is angry at ever single thing he sees. He is angry cos i woke up late (when its the weekend), he is angry when i watch anime, angry when i play games, angry when i eat, angry when i never help when he busy. Angry for the dish i chose when we eat out. Angry for drink fruit juice outside. Angry when u spend too much time in a shop at shopping center. He got the right to throw tantrum, but not me. I got my way of planning things, and he insist on getting stuck on his tradition thoughts. He dunno how to express himself, he only know how to give a sulky face, which no body knows what he exactly wants.

Another thing is his sudden death method of going out. I will be sitting there playing my PC when he storms in and say "WHY YOU HAVEN EVEN CHANGE!" and threaten to leave me alone at home. I wun mind staying at home, but he will threaten to say he wun buy any dinner or lunch for me. He never ever told ppl his plans for family outing. I got my day planned and he expect me to put down everything so suddenly to accustom to his unplanned outing? Not to mention free scoldings for nothing doing anything wrong. Ridiculous.

When im outfitted, he will comment on what i wear. "Why wear so nice? We gg market only" U never said! Fine, from then onwards, i will ask him where he going. Most of the time, if i ask mom, she will push to dad. When i ask dad, he wun give me a proper answer. "Err..buy fish..err...maybe eat?" Then how i know how to dress up for any particular places he wants to go?

Mom is another one of a kind. She thinks all our friends are baddies and all her's are dear sisters. She likes to doubt what our friends told us, but never doubt her own friends. Her friends consist of a group of aunties who sits down and gossip whole day long. Worst still, they can get into politics just liddat. And it involves me and my sis.

"I told XXXX you did ok for A levels ah, if she ask u then u better follow my story." WTF? I did POORLY in A levels. "I told your [insert relative name here] we going overseas for 10 of days ah, dun tell him anything else ah!" In actual face we gg some neighboring country for few days only. And she wants me to lie for her. For her sake. For her face.

The reverse cannot apply. Me and my sis cannot talk behind my mom's back. Me and my sis cannot lie, not only that we are to answer to all her questionings at all times. And i cannot relate my own ideas to my sis, else its considered "teaching her bad".

She always wanted me and my sis to goto her when she shouts our name. But when we call for her, she expect us to goto her. Sometimes there is no need to move around, our house isnt tt big, shouting out would be enuff to communicate and ask questions. Yet when there is not a need, she expect us to goto her.

Her expression skills are as bad as my dad. Take for example a recent incident:

"Your dun play computer, come and eat first!" She shouted.

Me, sis and dad came down, see nothing on the table. Mom was BBQing smthing in the corridors. The rest Sat at the sofa and watch TV. Meanwhile since there is nothing on the table, i went back up to complete some tasks on my PC.

Then she goes again, "Your dun play computer, come and eat first!". Again i see nothing on the table. So i went off to do something else.

She shouted to my dad, "Need to BBQ brinjals?". My dad said yes.

After 5 minutes, she threw her temper and shouted, "Come help me leh! Ah told your dun play computer come eat first liao! I tot you said wanna BBQ bringals? Why u never come (direct at my dad)"

Everyone was shocked. I told my mom i came down, nothing to eat leh. "Then why dun want to help me?!", I told her she never say she need help ma. The made shift BBQ pit was so small and she was previously so enthu in BBQing. So from that i derived she must be enjoying BBQ lor.

"Need to say one meh?! OF course help la! I already told u to stop playing computer and come down to eat!" Ya, i did came down. But u never say help you?! From what i see u are happily BBQing ma. 'Come down eat' and 'Come down help BBQ' are two totally different instructions! She only asked my dad is the brinjals need to be BBQed only, not as him to help. He is busy w work too.

We were taught in school and army to follow instructions carefully. Esp in army, u are to do as told precisely. Also learn to access the situation yourself. Seeing that
1. previously she was enthu in BBQ
2. never ask for help
3. and that BBQ isnt a very high priority or time critical task
4. I dun like BBQing

I safely left the task to my mom. Im not like my mom, who dun give ppl personal space. I seldom restrict or criticize what my mom does, unless i see that its important or it affects me. Why cant she give me the same space?

She assume i will help me. Base on? She will say "Common sense". I dun think thats common sense! If u dun express your need, how will i know what u need? We were taught to give each other personal space, until a help is called for, or when we see there is an immediate need. For what i saw, i dun think it will lead to a reaction of "i need to help my mom". On the other hand, im busying settle some networking for my sis.

She is always liddat. Assume this, assume that. What she could had done was just to say. "Eh, come help me leh". Thats all. I hate her assumptions of other ppl. And when its the right time to do intelligent assumption, she dun.

Her attitude towards her band of sisters are ok. But when facing her own family, she seems to have attitude problem. She nag for the smallest ever thing. And she keeps repeating the same thing. She cant tok to me or my sis properly. She got to shout and scold. She will yell and say "I NOT SCOLDING YOU, I TELLING YOU!"

Another Example:
"Why you never open the windows of the kitchen after cooking? Why? You know how much heat will be trapped inside? You know the food will turn bad? You how how bad it is?" And she goes on and on in her ringing voice.

The truth is, weather was cold and the wind was strong. so strong that it blows off the fire from the stove. So i closed the windows. I dint close them completed, i dint lock them, leaving a few cm of opened space. And that the kitchen WAS NOT as hot and warm as she claimed after i cooked. Its still chilly due to the weather. I ignored her and eat my food. 5 minutes later, she chided again "SAY LIAO STILL HAVEN OPEN WINDOW?"

Hello? Im still eating my food, and i really see no point in opening the windows, and most important of all, she NEVER SAY OPEN THE WINDOWS? All she did was to nag all her theories on me. All she could had done is to say nicely "eh, go open the windows. hot inside." And after i eat finish my food, i will open the windows when i wash my bowl.

All she wanted me was to open the windows. Tell me tt nicely and its done. Stop nagging..

Real World
I was reading this book called Real World. I was so engrossed with the plot, cos the problems faced w the characters seem to be very relevant to me. Its the story about how this guy(Worm) murdered his mom in japan. And how he stole his neighbor(Toshi)'s phone and get in touch with three other of Toshi's friend. Apparently all five of them are problem kids.

Worm is a fallen student from a private high school. Her mom keeps controlling him and wanted him to be of high standards. Worm feels that her mom herself isnt of any high standards, she feels so cos she is married to a doctor, and has a son in top school. But she herself is dumb and skilless. Worm feel that her mom is making use of him to make herself feel that her family is proud and noble, and completely ignoring his needs and feelings. Thus Worm killed her.

Toshi is worm's neighbor, though having a good family, she feels that the world is too commercialized, and grew up learning how to lie very well, as she fear once her true identity is exposed she will be gone case. Her phone and bike was stolen by Worm when he escaped.

Yuzan helped Worm to buy a new phone and bike, returning Toshi her own. Yuzan is actually a lesbian, she got a hard time deciding which is her true identity and fear being reject by society.

Kirarin met up w Worm on the course of escape, and stayed with him throughout. They eventually feel in love and had sex. Kirarin's mom died three years ago due to cancer and she got ditched by her bf. She stayed in depression and vain all the way, yet forcing herself to look cheerful always.

Terauchi is the smartest of all, has the ability to see through ppl's mind. Though she is tough, she tot her parents dint give her a hoot. They made her childhood dark, esp when her mom started to have an affair outside. She dun trust her mom, but force to trust her so that the whole family and her mind wun collapse. It ended up that she no longer trust herself anymore.

Im not gg to discuss the story line here, go read the book yourself. Its a story linking the five of them and how their own problems lead to tragedy.

Reading this book sort of remind me about myself, and ppl around me. I started recalling my screwed childhood, which has no memories except to mug and mug. My parents forced me to study and study. Mind you, the first time im allowed to go out on my own was during sec 4. The first time im allowed to go to school myself was sec 1. Im not allowed to listen to music or use computer freely till sec 4. Ang bao money all confiscated every yr cept for grandpa and grand ma and those from my mom, which has little money.

Im never allowed to freely use my savings till JC. Even then, all my pocket money are strictly controlled. I need to return any remaining amount to my mom, she will save it up for me, and that money wun be available till 21. My sister is going thru the same also. She got quite some money from bursaries as she got tip top results in school. My mom take more than half and stored it in her "Future Use Account" A small portion enters her currently used account. Even still, she dun have much access to any of the accounts. Most of the transaction still goes thru my mom. Which makes the whole system of having two separate account quite useless, since she can hardly draw out money.

I realised a flaw in my mom's system. U save maybe $3000 in that "future account". When u reach 21, u will already have some money for your own use. For my, from army. So when she release that "future account", it isnt any shocking large amount of money compared to what u already had now. A much better way would be to spread that sum of money and use it during your childhood to buy yourself some happiness. More balanced that way.

Bintan Tour
I went to Bintan for tour, but not worth mentioning as its totally boring. Im amazed my parents are willing to spend near to a thousand for the whole family for such a useless tour. Me and my sis already made hints that we rather not go, but end up still went. I tot maybe i would enjoy my times there. NO! After the trip i regretted even more! Not only i got to put up w all the typical nonsensical quarrels from my parents and the everlasting naggings, i got to put up w the '3 star' hotel summore. My sis says its more like -3stars. Hotel standards of army bunk, how does that sound?

I dun understand, when purchasing a product or service, i would look for:
1. Dun purchase at all, look for alternative or DIY
2. Purchase something with high value for money ratio, try to get the best out of the money
3. Hoot all the way, get as high end as i need

My parents apparently dun understand what is call value for money. They only know what is cheap. They heck care quality. In the case of the Bintan tour, i would easily choose choice 1 of not going at all, stay at home play game, or spend some effort in choice 2, look for somewhere value for money to go.

To me,
if quality is 50%, price is 10%, its value for money, cheap.
If quality is 50% and price is 50%, thats ok ok pricing.
If quality is 100% and price is 100%, thats not expensive, its worth the money.
If quality is 10% and price is 10%, thats not cheap! But still worth the money.

In the bintan case, its 50% price for a 10% quality. Expensive and not worth the money.

Is $1 cheap? Is $100000 expensive? We take $2 for example, i think its relatively cheap. But what if i say that $2 is needed to enter public toilet once? Thats expensive!!! What if i tell you that $2 can feed u one can of abalone? Thats cheap!

My parents like to say "eh LCD TV expensive la! Sony 40" need $999". That amount is made up, of course. But for a Sony 40" at $999, its CHEAP. So, that price is CHEAP. BUT, u cannot afford, its EXPENSIVE to your wallet! Then they will go on and kpkb why we should not have a Sony LCD TV...but thats only an analogy, it dint happen.

So, the point is. The Bintan tour sucks.

Nokia 5320
Got a 5320. 2 years i dint touch any phones except for my two army ones. Both are at the lowest end of the line and offer nearly no special features. Gadget siao me was so excited to explore the features of my new phone, from hardware to hacking symbian OS. Woot.

Despite all my rants, i do have wrong doings on my own part too. I know ppl will say i blame everyone but myself. But i already tried my best to accommodate to others, prolly my method isnt right. Army make boys to become men. I doubt so, but at least i absorb some working experience and dealing w ppl, thats good. But still dun help much w my shattered interpersonal links.

View/Post Comments (0)

Thursday, January 01, 2009
Happy New Year
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 2:16 AM --- Post#4774978059973221849

I Wish everyone a happy new year.

View/Post Comments (0)